WAKE UP, SIR by Jonathan Ames

by The Bushwick Book Club

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1.
Wake Up, Sir 04:57
Wake Up Sir Oh the life of an artiste can be so very triste Sometimes you wish you had a friend along So I made myself a man, to lend a helping hand And here’s the story written in a song Wake up, sir. open your eyes Time to sally forth into another adventure Good choice Jeeves, my butterfly tie Let’s pilot our Caprice into another disaster As you shave in the mirror, don’t make an error Let Errol Flynn reflect your grin Oh the places you’ll go if you follow your nose From Uncle Irwin’s house straight into the Rose A bath in Sharon Springs among the Hasidim Would be just the thing to set us straight I must admit to you, I lost an hour or two A human hill wanted me killed a nd beat up my face Wake up sir, and may I suggest That your dipsomania has gotten the best of you You’re quite right, as usual Jeeves Packa valise ofblazers please for now we must flee A dapper man like this deserves at least one kiss From a sexy, big-nosed colonist A kiss would be superb but what I would prefer Is more along the lines of nasalingus These days everyone’s using a vernacular That’s frankly inarticulate and unspectacular The Kraft is Ebbing, as you know / so they say So many questions, The Jew and the Homo With no one to answer but my trusty valet But no one’s looking for an answer anyway Wake up sir, It’s time to wake up Little tiny crabs are crawling on your pubis Good God Jeeves, I should be shot The gods have punished me for being drunken and foolish Cheer up, sir and get in the car Montreal’s lovely and not too far Thank you Jeeves you’re too good to be true Just like this story I made up about you (song) Wake up sir, you’re driving too fast / do we really exist / am I losing my mind / hair Was it only a dream / are we going to crash / is reality real / is it all in my mind
2.
He sits there grey and statue-like Still as stone and not so bright But he lays down the law And pulls the reigns so tight His voice is cold and thick with hate As I drop my pickle to the plate Like lowering my sword And we continue our debate One more round again Will I go down again Battling uncle lobster eyes Up against his oyster eyes Who will be the winner Will there ever be a winner Will there ever be a winner of this fight He says to me “You must be insane… What on earth has gone wrong in your brain? You talk to yourself and play solitaire But we know you’ve been drinking again” I say “It’s the road or rehab for me… I’ll take to the road and then you’ll see That I don’t need your tough love decree Please leave me alone and let me be free” One more round again Will I go down again Battling uncle lobster eyes Up against his oyster eyes Who will be the winner Will there ever be a winner Will there ever be a winner of this fight Spoken: Then he raises his head and …Here we go…. One more round again Will I go down again Battling uncle lobster eyes Up against his oyster eyes Who will be the winner Will I ever be a winner Will there ever be a winner of this fight Will there ever be a winner of this fight
3.
4.
Walk With Me 03:12
Who cares what you wanted and never got. Who cares that life was not what you thought. Who cares that you're not who you were going to be Forget the past and its indignities. Take my hand and walk with me. This is not a new start. We’re too old and too smart to pretend that we get more than what we got Leave ambition to beginners Let’s go get some dinner… And go for a walk. Walk with me We can move slow. There’s nowhere to go.
5.
I NEED A WALKER I want a walker, a cleaner, a giver a taker A talker, redeemer, decision maker A conversation refresher who’s good under pressure, A forgiver, forgetter, for worse or for better A good time supplier, fear denyer doom distractor, luck attractor who's quick with the laughter. A self esteem booster, a girl can get used to. I need a permission giver, a life affirmer with vigor. A road opener for when I want to go A slow motioner for when I don’t. Is there someone who says what he believes Someone whose very presence relieves Who can roll up his sleeves give as much as he receives? Really knows how to please Say, is your name Jeeves? I want a walker, a cleaner, a giver a taker A talker, redeemer, decision maker A conversation refresher who’s good under pressure, A forgiver, forgetter, for worse or for better Distract me from all I want to forget. If you’ve got the skills, I’ve got the check. Don’t you never leave me alone I’m just flesh and bones and all these hormones.
6.
Lullaby 03:52
Lullaby (inspired by Wake Up, Sir) little one, you’re tired little one, you’re blue when darkness comes, she covers you stories in your head stakes in your heart insanity, or is it art you want escape in dreams you’re found by the crushed grape in its waters drown go to sleep, my love go where you’re free and lose your mind as you lose your keys half of you is self half of you is breath your brain cells meet untimely death you want escape in dreams you’re found by the crushed grape in its waters drown taking flight on the tips of wing where busts are bronze and serotonin springs you want escape in dreams you’re found by the crushed grape in its waters drown wrecked from the start straight to your heart wrecked from the start the way to your heart
7.
8.
Wake Up, Sir 06:57
9.
Splitting 04:25
Splitting Wake up. Wake.  Wake up. Wake.  Forgot how to become yourself And you find that you're sure there's no one else To let you know you used to know Try to remember The way to find your other mind Bind them together  Wake up. Wake.  Wake up sir. Wake.  And when kindness makes you fall apart Because love makes it hard to hurt yourself  But in the dark it's just a spark Try to remember The way you find the other mind Bind them together So broken Can this broken mirror break your fall? Forgot how to become yourself And you find that you're sure you've got me To let you know you used to know Try to remember The way to find your other mind Bind them together But in the dark it's just a spark Try to remember The way you find the other mind
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The Towel 04:07
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about

All songs recorded live at Barbes in Brooklyn, April 30th, 2014 except for track 6. Special thanks to Pierre de Gaillande for cutting the tracks and doing initial mixing/editing of these tracks. Special thanks to Charlie Nieland for the extra compression and volume boost!

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released May 11, 2014

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The Bushwick Book Club Brooklyn, New York

We started in January 2009 playing songs written in response to Kurt Vonnegut's Breakfast of Champions. We haven't stopped since. We've written & performed songs inspired by everything from "On The Origin of Species" to Dr. Seuss to Raymond Carver. There are BBCs popping up nationwide now. Bushwick Book Club Seattle started in 2010 & is run by Geoff Larson. Our nerdy dare-devilry knows no bounds. ... more

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